Have your kids experienced bullying? What can you do to empower your kids to navigate high school, bullies, and difficult kids? Which principles should you teach your kids to help them make the best choices?

In this podcast remix episode, I am so excited to have my very own Porcupine, also known as Aubrey Cisneros, my good friend Melissa Vogel and her daughter Jovina Vogel on the show. We talk about rising above to empower your child against bullying with resilience and confidence.

Meet Melissa Vogel

Melissa Vogel, is the Business Owner and Operator of Melissa Vogel Fitness, LLC. She is a fitness expert with 20+ years of experience as a certified Personal Trainer and Group Fitness Instructor. As the creator of “Busy To Bomb Fit Mom”, she helps busy moms get back to being fit through mindset work, vision, and balance, combined with proper nutrition, and exercise.

As the host of the Bomb Mom Podcast, she entertains many different speakers over several topics in order to broaden listeners’ ideals of what health really is and to inspire listeners to find new avenues to set, reach, and maintain their goals. Melissa is not afraid to speak on topics others may find taboo, or embarrassing, in order to empower others to #getthehealthup! 

She’s also a model, actress, and an overall busy mom of three girls and three stepkids that continues to inspire women on their fitness journey.

Connect with Melissa Vogel on her website. Find her on LinkedIn. Listen to her Podcast HERE.

Summary

• Bullying and jealousy
• How to help your kids help themselves
• Teach empowerment

Bullying and jealousy

Bullying can occur due to many factors. Or, better put, people bully other people for different reasons – and not to justify it, but knowing these reasons can help to make some sense of why that behavior is occurring.

Most of the time – especially between teenage and young girls – bullying happens due to jealousy, and jealousy is often present in a person that has little to no self-esteem.

I would feel bad for her because it’s a lack of self-confidence. So much of bullying goes back to self-confidence. (Melissa Vogel)

People that are unhappy within themselves and feel a sense of “lacking” may latch onto other people that are happy in themselves, and do know their value.

Sometimes people will bully others because they secretly want what they have, and trying to take it away from them makes that person feel better about not having it in the first place.

How to help your kids help themselves

One of the main principles that you should work to instill in your kids is honesty, and the courage to speak it when it is necessary.

When feelings are hurt and people are upset, so many essentially unnecessary things can be said. Even if they are valid. However, what do you actually want to say? What does your kid really want to express to their friend?

Just be honest: what are you really feeling? And she’s like, “Mom, I miss it. I miss our friendship.” And I was like, “Well, that’s how we’re going to start your text message.” (Veronica Cisneros)

Teach them how to identify what they truly want to express, instead of them skirting around the issue because they’re too nervous to say what they mean.

That communication piece and having kids express themselves. Like, just say how you feel. It might not be reciprocated, and there might be consequences that you weren’t expecting, but it’s better than saying nothing and letting it just builds up inside you until you feel like you’re going to explode. (Melissa Vogel)

Teach your kids to be true to themselves by expressing themselves and what they really feel. If their friend doesn’t respond well, that is their problem, so long as your child knows that they did their piece in the best way possible.

Teach empowerment

A difficult – but very freeing – thing to learn is that you only have control over yourself. You cannot control someone else’s words, choices, or behaviors. You can only do that for yourself.

Your kids must know this too, and know that even if they had good intentions that they cannot make their friends be or do anything differently.

You can’t waste all your energy on trying to change someone when they’re obviously not going to change. (Jovina Vogel)

It is a painful truth to understand, but it frees you to know that you can then decide who to be with and who is truly good for you instead of trying to change someone.

Useful Links:

• Join our FaceBook Page – Empowered and Unapologetic
• Learn more about Marriage Coaching
• Take the Marriage Predictor quiz!
• Follow me on Instagram
• Check out the new website! https://veronicacisneros.org/
• Outside The Norm Counseling – 951 395 3288 Call to schedule an appointment today!
• Melissa Vogel Bomb Mom Podcast: https://melissavogelfitness.com/category/podcast/
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissa-vogel-62293887/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itsmelissavogel/?hl=en

Meet Veronica Cisneros

Hello, my name is Veronica Cisneros, I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Marriage Coach, Course Creator, Retreat Host, Mother of 3, married for 23 years, host of the Empowered and Unapologetic podcast, and owner of a group private practice called Outside The Norm Counseling.

A lot of couples struggle with setting aside intentional time to connect and communicate. They yearn for meaningful conversations that don’t lead to arguments.

1 month away from divorce, I realized I had to do something different. For years I had compromised myself to meet the needs of my husband and my child, I lost myself and was about to lose my marriage. After years of personal growth and self-reflection, I not only reclaimed my identity, and celebrated 23 years of marriage but also helped hundreds of couples transform their marriage from feeling like roommates to experiencing a deeper love.

I am on a mission to help couples reignite the fire by providing them with the skills to have the relationship they deserve.

Whether you listen to the podcast, join the free Facebook community, or do the Workshop,  you’re in the right place. Let’s do this together!

Thanks for listening!

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