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Let me take you back to the moment I dropped off my firstborn, Aaliyah, at her college dorm. I held it together (barely) through the hugging, decorating, and 50,000 photos… but as soon as I got into the car, I lost it. Like full-on, ugly cry all the way home. Because I knew. I knew that moment was a line in the sand—before and after.

Fast forward to now, and the plot twist? I’m back in the emotional trenches. Aaliyah is graduating college. Aubrey is graduating high school and leaving the state. And Brooklyn, my little Monkey Feet, will be the last one left at home. So this Mother’s Day, I sat down with all three of my girls for a no-filter, full-feels conversation about what it’s like to grow up, leave home, and navigate all the messy in-betweens.

If you’re a mom who’s ever cried in a Target parking lot because your kid won’t need you to pack their lunch anymore—this one’s for you.

When “Home” Isn’t a Place, It’s Your People

Aaliyah said it best—“Home isn’t a place anymore, it’s the people you surround yourself with.” Sure, she was excited to be on her own, to have her freedom. But what surprised her was how quickly the homesickness set in. “I can’t just go into your room after a nightmare anymore. I had to figure it all out by myself.”

And she did—eventually. But not without growing pains.

“One thing I didn’t know how to do? Handle conflict on my own. Mom, you were always my backup plan.”
— Aaliyah Cisneros

Oof. Right in the mom-heart.

It hit me that maybe I stepped in too often. Maybe I was so set on protecting her that I didn’t give her space to fail forward. But that’s what this season is all about, isn’t it? The terrifying trust fall of motherhood.

The Silent Pressures We Don’t Talk About

Here’s what I didn’t expect: my girls carry their own invisible weights—trying not to disappoint us, trying to live up to their own impossible standards.

Aaliyah confessed, “I don’t want to let you down. I don’t want to feel like I didn’t become who I was supposed to be.”

And here’s the twist: I feel the exact same way about them.

“We don’t want to fail you. We want to make sure we taught you everything.”
— Me (a mom just trying her best)

This whole “launching your kid into the world” thing is beautiful, brutal work. And spoiler alert: nobody has it figured out.

Real Talk: What Daughters Wish Moms Knew

From fearing the freshman 15 to learning how to use a washing machine (yes, Aubrey, I’m looking at you), this next chapter has all the uncertainty of a Netflix drama.

But what stood out most in our conversation? The emotional honesty.

Brooklyn, my youngest, is watching her sisters pack and plan and push forward—and she’s quietly grieving the loss of the house as she’s always known it.

“It makes me want to cry. You guys have been there my whole life. I don’t know what I’m going to do without you.”
— Brooklyn, aka Monkey Feet

Yeah, cue the waterworks.

So What Can We Actually Do?

Whether your daughter is walking across the graduation stage or just walking into adolescence, here’s what I’ve learned:

• Let them fail. And be there when they come back to process it.
• Talk about the hard stuff. Vulnerability is messy, but it’s also magnetic.
• Stay connected. FaceTime, group chats, surprise care packages—lean into what works, not what looks good on paper.

And to the dads out there? Don’t brush off your wife’s tears. Even if she knows this is what’s supposed to happen, it still stings. As my husband put it:

“The worst thing I could do is hold them back from experiencing the world. But I can be there when they need to come home.”
— My incredibly wise husband

Final Thoughts (and a Tissue)

To every mama navigating this bittersweet season—you’re not alone. It’s okay to cry in the car. It’s okay to wonder if you got it all right. And it’s definitely okay to wish they’d come home every weekend forever.

Just remember: your love gave them wings. And that means you did your job.

I hope you had a Happy Mother’s Day from my crazy, loud, beautifully imperfect family to yours.

xo,
Veronica

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• Outside The Norm Counseling – 951 395 3288 call to schedule an appointment today!
• 5 Things that are Killing your Marriage Free Guide available at www.veronicacisneros.org

Meet Veronica Cisneros

As a leading authority in women’s empowerment and a fierce advocate for building strong networks, Veronica is your go-to guru for turning fears into victories, struggles into strengths, and doubts into boundless opportunities.
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist for 10 plus years; empowering high-achieving women in business to conquer both professional heights and personal fulfillment. She doesn’t do bandaids!
Veronica has a unique approach to overcoming obstacles and smashing through the glass ceilings that loom over ambitious women. With her arsenal of practical tools, actionable strategies, and unwavering support, Veronica doesn’t just help women succeed in their careers – she helps them thrive in every facet of their lives.

But Veronica’s expertise isn’t just theoretical – it’s personal. With over 24 years of marriage, three daughters, and a soaring career, Veronica embodies the resilience and determination needed to navigate life’s challenges. As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Group Private Practice Owner, of Outside The Norm Counseling, Marriage Coach, and the voice behind the Empowered and Unapologetic podcast, Veronica effortlessly guides women to challenge themselves beyond their comfort zones.

Veronica is more than an expert – she’s a partner in transformation, turning mundane relationships into true connections. With her relatable charm and infectious humor, Veronica illuminates the path for women who refuse to settle for anything less than success in both business and relationships. Through practical tips, heartfelt anecdotes, and her trademark wit, Veronica empowers every woman to cultivate unbreakable bonds without sacrificing their ambitions.

Whether you listen to the podcast, join the free Facebook community, or do the Workshop,  you’re in the right place. Let’s do this together!

Thanks for listening!

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