Are you a successful entrepreneur who’s also a mother and a wife? How can you handle a partner that feels threatened by your success? How can you and your partner find a new dynamic in your relationship that can grow with the changes?

In this reverse podcast episode, I am so excited to have Janessa Borges on and together we discuss marriage, entrepreneurship, and the balancing act of love and business. I share stories about Willie and myself that I have not shared on the podcast before.

Meet Janessa Borges

Janessa is a first-generation Latina therapist, speaker, business strategist, and coach for entrepreneurs & soon to be an author.

Janessa was born and raised in Miami and attained her degree from the clinically intensive program at NYU. She has over twenty years of experience working with individuals and families.

After over 12 years in practice, Janessa is in the process of finalizing a book, and she created a program that helps clinicians open, market, and scale their own successful private practices.

Janessa hosts networking events throughout the U.S. and her podcast “Latinas Empowering Latinas” helps reach and support others throughout the world.

Connect with Janessa Borges on her website. Listen to her Podcast Here.

Summary

• Overcoming early marriage issues
• Navigating solo entrepreneurship in marriage
• How to handle a threatened partner when you are successful

Overcoming early marriage issues

Back in the early years of their marriage, Willie Cisneros worked as a drill sergeant and Veronica was living with him during his three-year duty.

Although they didn’t know it at the time, their communication habits were unhelpful, and they often turned against one another and into people that they didn’t recognize in each other.

I didn’t know ,you don’t know what you don’t know. I didn’t know that he and I didn’t have good coping strategies. I didn’t know we weren’t talking well because he and I grew up in Hispanic cultures where you don’t talk. (Veronica Cisneros)

In those early days, Veronica and Willie fought to be the winner in conflict, and it took them many years and a lot of effort to find the right type of communication and coping strategies to actually communicate to one another, and listen well.

Navigating solo entrepreneurship in marriage

It can be challenging to be an entrepreneur at the best of times, but when you are in a marriage with someone who might not be fully supportive of your work, it can feel nearly impossible.

Ideally, our partners should encourage and support us in our choices and desires, but sometimes the communication might fall through or you and your partner might not be on the same page.

Listen, you’ve got to know who you are. You’ve got to know who you are outside of your relationship outside of being a mom, outside of being a wife. At the core, who are you? … and what do you want? (Veronica Cisneros)

There are going to be a lot of road bumps along your way to your dream or goal. You need to know that your destination is aligned to you so that you can overcome these, and get on the right track with your partner.

You have to invest in yourself because insecurities can often come up. You need to be secure in who you are, your passions, values, and skills so that when those difficulties come up you can rely on them to keep you going.

How to handle a threatened partner when you are successful

If your relationship is at this point and you’re at this ultimatum, your relationship needs skills and this is where I come in, to help you navigate through these unchartered waters. (Veronica Cisneros)

You need to identify the state that your relationship is in. If you and your partner are not able to have difficult conversations that don’t turn into massive arguments, then you both need some skills.

This is a transitional moment. This is a difficult time for both of you because even though this success is truly good it signifies a change in your relationship that you both need to adjust to.

It’s literally a grieving period for both of you. You’re no longer that person you once were, you know, “Susie-homemaker” … and your husband no longer has that life that he thought he would have and envisioned which is also now in his eyes crumbling. (Veronica Cisneros)

• You need to identify what this triggers for you: which insecurities are coming up for you?
• Have an open conversation with your partner: when you are both calm and relaxed, ask them what this has been like for them (with your guard being down!)
• What is your greatest fear? Ask yourself and also ask your partner.

Useful Links:

• Join our FaceBook Page – Empowered and Unapologetic
• Learn more about Marriage Coaching
• Take the Marriage Predictor quiz!
• Follow me on Instagram
• Check out the new website! https://veronicacisneros.org/
• Outside The Norm Counseling – 951 395 3288 Call to schedule an appointment today!
• Janessa’s Website: https://latinasempoweringlatinas.com/
• Janessa’s Podcast: https://latinasempoweringlatinas.com/podcast-latinas-empowering-latinas/

Meet Veronica Cisneros

Hello, my name is Veronica Cisneros, I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Marriage Coach, Course Creator, Retreat Host, Mother of 3, married for 23 years, host of the Empowered and Unapologetic podcast, and owner of a group private practice called Outside The Norm Counseling.

A lot of couples struggle with setting aside intentional time to connect and communicate. They yearn for meaningful conversations that don’t lead to arguments.

1 month away from divorce, I realized I had to do something different. For years I had compromised myself to meet the needs of my husband and my child, I lost myself and was about to lose my marriage. After years of personal growth and self-reflection, I not only reclaimed my identity, and celebrated 23 years of marriage but also helped hundreds of couples transform their marriage from feeling like roommates to experiencing a deeper love.

I am on a mission to help couples reignite the fire by providing them with the skills to have the relationship they deserve.

Whether you listen to the podcast, join the free Facebook community, or do the Workshop,  you’re in the right place. Let’s do this together!

Thanks for listening!

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