The buzzer goes off, you wake up, start your day and here you are again, finding yourself simply going through the motions. Day in and day out, the same thing, not even connecting with the tasks at hand. You’re on autopilot…Right?
Mama, how often do you make yourself a priority? You feel unhappy most days but you are not even sure why? Do you care for everyone else’s happiness before your own?
If you don’t make yourself a priority, nobody else will. You can’t pour from an empty cup and be your best self without putting yourself first.
I am so excited to have Nancy Pickard on this podcast episode. Nancy Pickard is a Certified Integrative Coach through The Ford Institute for Transformational Training and the Levin Life Coach Academy. She is certified as a Breakthrough Shadow Coach, Empowered Parent Coach, Courage Coach, Healing Your Heart Coach, Leadership Coach, Holistic Lifestyle Coach, and Bigger Better Braver Coaching. She is the author of the international bestseller, Bigger Better Braver: Conquer your Fears, Embrace your Courage, Transform your Life.
In this episode, we talk about why your needs aren’t being met by your Husband. Setting boundaries and how to develop a relationship with yourself.
Meet Nancy Pickard
Nancy Pickard is a Certified Integrative Coach through The Ford Institute for Transformational Training and the Levin Life Coach Academy.
She is certified as a Breakthrough Shadow Coach, Empowered Parent Coach, Courage Coach, Healing Your Heart Coach, Leadership Coach, Holistic Lifestyle Coach, and Bigger Better Braver Coaching.
She is the author of the international bestseller, Bigger Better Braver: Conquer your Fears, Embrace your Courage, Transform your Life.
Visit her website. Connect on Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, and Clubhouse – @cnancyrun.
Freebie: Free Chapter to Bigger Better Braver, Free Boundary Checklist, Free ToolBox to Self-Love to get started, and Free quiz – Where are you on the path to a Bigger Better Braver life?
In This Podcast
Summary
- Getting out of autopilot
- Questions to develop your relationship with yourself
- Move forward in your life
- Nancy’s advice to overwhelmed moms
Getting out of autopilot
Autopilot is going through the motions. You’re not aware of what you’re doing, you’re not emotionally present so you don’t even know if you’re happy, you don’t even know if things are working in your life, you’re just running on fumes. (Nancy Pickard)
Being on autopilot can lead you to feel completely out of touch and disconnected from your life.
Luckily, there are ways to get out of being in the autopilot state:
- Ask yourself: what is the most self-honoring thing I can do for myself today?
By starting here, you are already centering yourself and your needs within your daily routine. You are making intentional space for what you need, and providing yourself with the opportunity, time, and energy to make it happen.
Are you setting healthy boundaries? Are your boundaries being kept? These are all things that we aren’t aware of when we’re just going through the motions. (Nancy Pickard)
Questions to develop your relationship with yourself
Women are more likely, from how they were taught as children, to put others before themselves. Even though women may do this in kindness, ultimately it leaves them feeling depleted, resentful, and seeking external validation.
You can self-validate. You can commit to loving yourself. Committing to the dreams that you have for your own life is the first step to proving to yourself that you are worth your own time and energy.
Before you make a decision or take an action, ask yourself:
- Will this propel me to the future I want or keep me in the past?
- Is this an act of faith or an act of fear?
- Am I doing this to serve myself or am I doing this to serve another?
When you start to ask yourself some of these questions before you take action, you’re out of autopilot, you’re being mindful … once you do that you’re actually in a place to give more willingly because you have already taken care of yourself. (Nancy Pickard)
Think of your dreams and goals and come up with something that you can do, even for a moment, that will take you one step closer to achieving them. Do this every day and commit to it as a sign that you are committed to loving yourself and fulfilling your needs.
Move forward in your life
You just stay on your side of the street and you work on yourself, because you’re in a dance with your partner, and when the dance partner changes, the dance changes … you just keep working on you and the change will come. (Nancy Pickard)
Some people feel stuck in life because they feel that their partner is not on board with doing the inner work alongside them. Be careful not to fall into the trap of becoming self-righteous about working on yourself and using it to bash your partner for not doing what you are.
Keep working on your own life and yourself and the change in the relationship will come. Stick to your boundaries, maintain your growth, and they will either begin to notice and make changes themselves, or they will move.
Both are important answers, but you must remain true to your work and not try to fix them on their behalf.
Nancy’s advice to overwhelmed moms
Where can you begin to make the changes? Who can you get to help you? You can surround yourself with people who support and encourage you in your dreams. You do not have to do everything alone.
Books mentioned in this episode:
Nancy Pickard – Bigger, Better, Braver: Conquer Your Fears, Embrace Your Courage, Transform Your Life
Debbie Ford – The Right Questions: Ten Essential Questions to Guide You To An Extraordinary Life
Useful links:
- How to Deal with an Emotionally Unavailable Husband | EU 87
- FREE Guide Download – 5 Mistakes to Avoid for a Healthy Marriage
- Sign up for the VIP membership
- Join Our Girl Gang
- Empowered And Unapologetic Free Course
Meet Veronica Cisneros
I’m a licensed therapist and women walk into my office every day stressed and disconnected. As a mom of three daughters, I want my girls to know who they are and feel confident about their future. I can’t think of a better way to help other women than by demonstrating an empowered and unapologetic life.
So I started Empowered and Unapologetic to be a safe space for women to be vulnerable and change their lives for the better before she ever needs to see a therapist.
Whether you listen to the podcast, join the free Facebook community, join the VIP community, or attend our annual retreat, you’re in the right place. Let’s do this together!
Thanks for listening!
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