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The Myth of Perfection: Embracing Imperfection in Motherhood | EU 2199 min read

April 28, 2024

When we let go of the myth of perfection, we open up ourselves to a world of beauty, and imperfection, and the joy of being true to who we really are.

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We’re gonna get real about something that hits close to home for many of us—perfection in motherhood. I’m Veronica Cisneros, and today we’re diving deep into why it’s time to chuck that myth out the window and start embracing our beautiful imperfections.

I kicked off the episode by sharing some of my own (cringe-worthy) stories because, let’s be honest, we’ve all been there. From stressing over having a picture-perfect home to feeling like we should be Super Mom 24/7, I’ve been caught up in those unrealistic expectations too. And don’t even get me started on the guilt and shame that can creep in when we inevitably fall short.

But here’s the thing, folks. It’s time to break free from those myths that hold us back. In this episode, I’m laying out some simple steps to help us all ditch the perfectionism and embrace a little thing called self-compassion. We’re talking setting realistic expectations, celebrating what makes us unique, and surrounding ourselves with a tribe of badass women who lift us up.

Because here’s the truth—motherhood isn’t about being flawless. It’s messy, it’s chaotic, and yeah, sometimes we mess up. And you know what? That’s perfectly okay. So let’s rewrite the narrative, let’s redefine what it means to be a mom, and let’s do it all with a whole lot of authenticity, self-love, and acceptance. Ready to join me on this journey? Let’s do this.

Summary

  • Embrace imperfection in motherhood and release the myth of perfection.
  • Practice self-compassion and establish realistic expectations for yourself.
  • Celebrate your unique strengths, quirks, and imperfections—they make you who you are.
  • Surround yourself with supportive friends, family, and communities for empowerment.
  • Reframe guilt and shame with positive affirmations and self-validations.

“You’re going to be a super mom in the midst of chaos. You’re going to be a super mom that messes up.” (Veronica Cisneros)

Myth number one: The Perfect Home.

You know that idea that a spotless house equals a flawless mom? Total nonsense, right? I used to stress over every little mess, but now? Nah, not worth it. Skipping a bed-making session or leaving dishes in the sink? No biggie. It’s about realizing whose standards we’re really trying to meet. Hint: it’s not always ours. Letting go of the perfectionism means we can focus on what truly matters—creating a cozy, loving space for our families and ourselves.

But here’s the kicker: it’s not just about the physical space. It’s about the memories we create, the laughter that fills the rooms, and the love that flows freely. So next time you catch yourself stressing over a little clutter, remember that imperfection is where the magic happens.

Why was it so important to me? This is something within my control. If I have a clean house, I’m fine. If I have a clean house, I’m distracted… if that right there is what identifies you as a mom, you as a wife, you as a human being, homegirl, then we gotta check that. We gotta check it. Why? Because you might be losing yourself in that.(Veronica Cisneros)

Myth number two: Super Mom Syndrome.

Ever feel like you’re supposed to juggle a career, keep the house spotless, and raise perfect kids without breaking a sweat? Ha, yeah, me neither. It’s exhausting even thinking about it. I’ve had my moments of trying to be Super Mom, but you know what? It’s a recipe for burnout. Real talk: being a super mom isn’t about doing it all flawlessly; it’s about embracing our imperfections and finding balance. It’s in those messy, imperfect moments that we show our strength and authenticity.

But to be a true super mom, it’s to recognize that you’re going to be a super mom in the midst of chaos. You’re going to be a super mom that messes up. And the reason why you’re a super mom is because you embrace vulnerability. You recognize when you’re wrong, and you’re able to learn and grow from it. (Veronica Cisneros)

And let’s get real about something else—perfection is overrated. Our kids don’t need a mom who has it all together all the time. They need a mom who shows up, mess and all, and loves them fiercely. So let’s embrace the chaos, the spilled milk, and the missed deadlines. Because in the end, it’s not about being perfect; it’s about being present.

Myth number three: Comparison Trap.

Step three on our journey? Celebrating our uniqueness. Our quirks and imperfections? That’s what makes us badass moms. Embrace your weirdness—it’s what sets you apart and makes you awesome. By owning our individuality, we’re not just teaching our kids to love themselves, but we’re also creating a more inclusive world for them to thrive in.

And guess what? Our imperfections aren’t just okay—they’re downright beautiful. They’re the quirks that make us who we are, the little things that make us unique. So let’s stop trying to fit into some cookie-cutter mold of what a mom should be and start celebrating the badass women we already are.

Myth number four: Sacrificing Self for Others.

Surrounding yourself with supportive friends, family, and communities? Vital. That’s why I started Empower X—a place for badass women like you to lift each other up, celebrate victories, and navigate motherhood together. Having a squad behind you during the tough times and cheering you on during the wins? It’s everything.

Because here’s the thing: motherhood is tough, but it’s a whole lot easier when you’ve got a tribe of women who’ve got your back. So let’s lean on each other, laugh together, and lift each other up. Because when women support each other, incredible things happen.

I can’t tell you how many women will say that they can’t pursue their dreams. They can’t pursue their goals because what would that do to their kids? I’m going to tell you right now what it’ll do to your kids. It will teach them that their mom can do hard things. It will teach them independence.

You’ll be their role model. And yes, is there sacrifice? A thousand percent. You’re the one that gets to determine how much sacrifice there is, but it can’t come at your own cost. (Veronica Cisneros)

Myth number five: Guilt and Shame.

Let’s ditch the negative self-talk and replace it with some serious self-love. You’re enough, mama, just as you are. And if you need a little help with that, don’t sweat it—I’ve got your back, and so does our awesome community. By flipping the script on guilt and shame, we’re empowering ourselves to embrace imperfection and rock this mom gig with confidence.

How do we break the myths and embrace imperfection? It starts with self-compassion and letting go of unrealistic expectations. (Veronica Cisneros)

How do we break the myths and embrace imperfection?

Step 1: Cultivate self-compassion

Step 2: Set realistic expectations

Step 3: Celebrate uniqueness.

Step 4: Build supportive communities.

Step 5: Challenge negative self-talk

Because here’s the truth: guilt and shame? They don’t serve us. They hold us back, they keep us small. But when we replace them with love and acceptance, we open ourselves up to a whole new world of possibilities. So let’s choose love, let’s choose acceptance, and let’s choose to embrace the beautiful messiness of motherhood, imperfections and all.

Empower X

Let’s create your own truth and motherhood. One that is not dictated by society or culture, but is rooted in authenticity, self-love, and acceptance. When we let go of the myth of perfection, we open up ourselves to a world of beauty, and imperfection, and the joy of being true to who we really are. Click here to join Empower X.

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Meet Veronica Cisneros

As a leading authority in women’s empowerment and a fierce advocate for building strong networks, Veronica is your go-to guru for turning fears into victories, struggles into strengths, and doubts into boundless opportunities.
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist for 10 plus years; empowering high-achieving women in business to conquer both professional heights and personal fulfillment. She doesn’t do bandaids!
Veronica has a unique approach to overcoming obstacles and smashing through the glass ceilings that loom over ambitious women. With her arsenal of practical tools, actionable strategies, and unwavering support, Veronica doesn’t just help women succeed in their careers – she helps them thrive in every facet of their lives.

But Veronica’s expertise isn’t just theoretical – it’s personal. With over 24 years of marriage, three daughters, and a soaring career, Veronica embodies the resilience and determination needed to navigate life’s challenges. As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Group Private Practice Owner, of Outside The Norm Counseling, Marriage Coach, and the voice behind the Empowered and Unapologetic podcast, Veronica effortlessly guides women to challenge themselves beyond their comfort zones.

Veronica is more than an expert – she’s a partner in transformation, turning mundane relationships into true connections. With her relatable charm and infectious humor, Veronica illuminates the path for women who refuse to settle for anything less than success in both business and relationships. Through practical tips, heartfelt anecdotes, and her trademark wit, Veronica empowers every woman to cultivate unbreakable bonds without sacrificing their ambitions.

Whether you listen to the podcast, join the free Facebook community, or do the Workshop,  you’re in the right place. Let’s do this together!

Thanks for listening!

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I’m Veronica, your new Boss MOM Mentor with no filter and no BS. 

I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist, women’s coach, course creator, and retreat host. Married for OVER 20 years, raising three girls, and the host of the Empowered and Unapologetic podcast. 

Enough about me… 

My jam? Helping high-achieving women thrive both at home and in the hustle of work.

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