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Pregnant and Single: Why I left | EU 1194 min read

May 30, 2022

If your kids had the same relationship as you and your partner currently have right now, to this very day, would you praise them, or would you pray for them? Let that sink in a little. Do you have a 5-year plan? If so, what does that look like, and how are you going to […]

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I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, marriage coach, course creator, retreat host, mother of 3, married for 23 years and host of the Empowered and Unapologetic podcast. 

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If your kids had the same relationship as you and your partner currently have right now, to this very day, would you praise them, or would you pray for them? Let that sink in a little.

Do you have a 5-year plan? If so, what does that look like, and how are you going to be a part of that 5-year plan? Do you trust your partner? Do you feel satisfied in your relationship?

In today’s episode, I speak with *Susan. She has one child and is currently pregnant with her second baby. She has made the decision to rather be a single mom than let her children grow up in a relationship that was making her feel more alone than ever.

*guest’s name has been changed to protect her identity

In This Podcast

Summary

  • “It is about me too”
  • You are deserving of respect
  • Stick with your standards

“It is about me too”

It can be incredibly difficult to decide to leave a partner, especially if there is still love there, and if children are involved.

However, you need to realize – as much as you want to make it work – that there is a boundary between sacrificing yourself and compromising on your needs, to self-abandoning and devaluing yourself by staying in a poor or unhealthy relationship.

My mom told me, “What do you want for yourself?” and then I immediately knew; “You know what, I want to be in a place of health. I want my children to see two healthy adults. (*Susan)

You are worthy of happiness, fulfillment, and joy. You are worth fighting for, especially when it comes to finding a good partner and having them also commit to making it work because you cannot carry the entire relationship alone.

I pictured myself in the future, and it is hard to picture yourself in the future without the person you wanted to imagine your future with, but I think the decision that ultimately moved me forward was, “it’s about me too”. (*Susan)

You are deserving of respect

Whether you have kids or don’t, whether you are married or not, whether you are younger or older, you deserve respect.

You do not have to pander to anyone.

If you are making a decision based on the physical, mental, and emotional wellbeing of yourself and your children, then do not bother with the opinions of others.

It wasn’t necessarily that I wanted this for myself, it’s that I had to do this for myself. (*Susan)

A lot of people stay in unhealthy relationships or marriages because of the fear of judgment if they leave. Remember, do not let your life and your happiness be dictated or suppressed by other people’s opinions.

Your life and your happiness matter more than what someone else thinks.

Stick with your standards

I have standards, and if you cannot meet them then I have to let you go. I have requirements, I have boundaries, and if you cannot respect that, then I need to let you go. (*Susan)

You can stand up for what you want in the relationship. Avoid minimizing your desires and needs to keep your partner, because that is self-abandonment.

Stick with your standards and enforce your boundaries, and find a partner that is willing to make it work with you and who shares their standards with you too so that you have mutual respect for each other’s wishes.

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Meet Veronica Cisneros

Veronica Cisneros | Empowered And Unapologetic Podcast

Hello, my name is Veronica Cisneros, I am a licensed marriage and family therapist for over 7 years, a Group Private Practice owner, a Mother of 3, and married for over 20 years. I help housewives transform their marriage, communicate effectively and build confidence. Like you, I also struggled with cutting through the communication barriers. I felt like there was no reason for my husband and me to feel unhappy because we had it all. We just felt disconnected and our conversations were filled with avoidance, kids’ hobbies, and schedules. 

I’ve helped plenty of couples in my private practice who struggled with similar issues. With my proven strategies and step-by-step skills, I’ve helped hundreds of women reignite their marriages. I am known for helping women step outside of their comfort zones, I don’t do bandaids, I only teach life-changing healing methods.

Whether you listen to the podcast, join the free Facebook community, or join our ‘Reconnect with your Husband’ Workshop,  you’re in the right place. Let’s do this together!

Thanks for listening!

Did you enjoy this podcast? Feel free to share this podcast on social media! You can also leave a review of the Empowered and Unapologetic Podcast on Apple Podcast {previously iTunes) and subscribe!

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I’m Veronica, your new Boss MOM Mentor with no filter and no BS. 

I'm a licensed marriage and family therapist, women’s coach, course creator, and retreat host. Married for OVER 20 years, raising three girls, and the host of the Empowered and Unapologetic podcast. 

Enough about me… 

My jam? Helping high-achieving women thrive both at home and in the hustle of work.

I've been there.

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Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Marriage Coach, Course Creator, Retreat Host, Mother of 3, Married for over 20 years.

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