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Ever felt like you’re juggling so many balls that taking care of yourself seems impossible?

Ever wonder how your personal well-being can ripple out to impact your relationships, including your marriage?

In this episode, we’re diving into the world of self-care and personal wellness with O’Neil Luscombe, the founder of No Limits. O’Neil, who grew up navigating tough circumstances, brings a fresh perspective to the conversation. He shares how his experiences shaped his unique approach to coaching busy professional women.

From the effects of negative self-care to the importance of intrinsic motivation, we explore it all. Get ready to hear how taking responsibility for your happiness and investing in your personal health can transform your life and relationships. Tune in for insights that might just change the way you think about self-care and success!

“Prioritizing personal health fuels not only your body but also your relationships.” – Veronica Cisneros

Summary

• Having a good relationship with oneself is essential for healthy relationships with others, including marriage.
• Negative self-care can lead to anxiety, depression, and even suicidal thoughts.
• Challenges faced by busy professional women, such as lack of time and financial resources, can negatively impact their marriages.
• Breaking limiting beliefs and being honest with oneself are important steps towards personal growth and well-being. Take responsibility for your own happiness and don’t blame others.
• Reach out for help when you are at your breaking point or rock bottom.
• Hold yourself accountable to your unbreakable promise, a commitment to your personal development.
• Intrinsic motivation is key to sustaining behavior change.
• Understand the consequences and have a clear vision to drive your actions.
• Look at the transformation stories of successful individuals to see the benefits of investing in personal health.

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A Personal Story That Resonates

O’Neil shares a profoundly personal story that resonates with me. Raised by a single mother of seven after his father was deported, O’Neil’s early life was filled with hardship, including frequent moves and stays in women’s domestic abuse shelters. These experiences shaped his approach to coaching and his understanding of resilience.

O’Neil’s story, though filled with challenges, has given him a unique perspective that connects with his clients. His journey of survival offers empathy and understanding to those he coaches.

“I used to be uncomfortable talking about my story, but I think it resonates with the women I coach. Everyone has struggles—mine just happen to be a little different.” – O’Neil Lescombe

Breaking Negative Self-Care Patterns

We delve into breaking unhealthy self-care patterns that many professional women fall into. O’Neil points out that neglecting personal health while pursuing career success or family obligations can lead to physical exhaustion and emotional burnout, which in turn affects relationships. His “tough love” approach helps clients recognize and shift these harmful behaviors.

“A little tough love from a place of compassion is what’s needed to break out of those old patterns,” O’Neil explains, stressing the need to push beyond comfort zones for better health.

My Personal Connection to Tough Love

I share my own story, reflecting on the chaos of growing up in a home affected by my father’s addiction and gang involvement. Feeling a strong sense of responsibility to protect my mother, I spent much of my childhood searching for a way to fix our situation. This experience deeply influenced my understanding of self-worth and survival.

“Growing up, I thought if I could just figure out the formula, I could save my mom and fix my dad. It took me years to realize it wasn’t my job to solve those problems.” – Veronica Cisneros

I relate this personal story to the broader issue of women overextending themselves while trying to solve problems for others, often neglecting their own needs. This cycle of behavior often results in negative patterns where self-care is treated as an afterthought.

Understanding the Squeaky Wheel Effect

Drawing from my experience as a licensed therapist, I discuss the “squeaky wheel” effect, where individuals, often middle children like O’Neil, act out to gain attention in chaotic environments. O’Neil reflects on his childhood behavior, recognizing that his rebelliousness was a way to seek recognition.

“I think I found pride and identity in being the ‘bad kid’ because it got me recognized. Looking back, I can see how I was just trying to be noticed.” – O’Neil Luscombe

This dynamic mirrors how many women feel as adults—underappreciated and overworked, striving to meet others’ expectations while neglecting their own needs. The message is clear: women need to start prioritizing their health and well-being, rather than treating it as secondary.

Moving from Survival to Thriving

Both O’Neil and I discuss the transition from merely surviving to truly thriving. O’Neil’s coaching helps women move from survival mode—emotionally, mentally, and physically—into a place of thriving. I echo this sentiment, encouraging listeners to set clear boundaries and carve out time for themselves, even when it seems impossible.

“You don’t have to keep surviving. You can move into thriving—by taking care of yourself first.” – Veronica Cisneros

The Value of Life Experience over Formal Credentials

O’Neil highlights the importance of life experience over formal credentials. He shares how his personal challenges and practical knowledge are just as valuable, if not more so, than academic achievements.

“Your story is your credential,” O’Neil says. “I’ll take the practical any day of the week.”

O’Neil compares the wisdom gained from overcoming personal struggles to theoretical knowledge from formal education. This approach resonates with many professional women who face limiting beliefs around time and money.

The Fear Behind Letting Go

We also tackle the common struggle many women face—fixating on losing those “last 10 pounds.” O’Neil explains that this weight often symbolizes something deeper, such as a broader sense of unfulfillment. For many high-achieving women, dissatisfaction with their bodies reflects unresolved emotional issues.

“Women often equate their weight with everything going wrong in their life,” O’Neil notes.

Self-Sabotage and Identity

I point out that these 10 pounds often become intertwined with a woman’s identity. The fear of losing them can feel like losing a part of oneself. This fear of change can lead to self-sabotage, affecting not just self-image but also relationships and professional life.

“It’s not just about the 10 pounds, but what they represent. And that screws us up big time.” – Veronica Cisneros

The Unbreakable Promise: A Deeper Commitment

O’Neil introduces the concept of the “Unbreakable Promise,” emphasizing accountability through a deep, emotional commitment rather than just focusing on weight loss. Women are encouraged to reflect on how their actions affect those they love and to make a meaningful promise to change.

“We don’t hold them accountable for weight loss; we hold them accountable for their unbreakable promise,”O’Neil said.

Empower Yourself

We wrap up with a powerful reminder: self-care is essential, not selfish. Both O’Neil and I urge listeners to examine their patterns of neglect and prioritize health and wellness, not just for themselves but for the people who depend on them.

“It’s time to stop surviving and start thriving—by taking care of yourself first,” O’Neil concludes.

By embracing wellness, women can live fuller, more empowered lives and show up as their best selves in every role they play!

At Outside the Norm Counseling, we’re here to support you. Visit us at www.OutsideTheNormCounseling.com to learn more about how we can help you navigate these challenges.

Meet O’Neil Luscombe

O’Neil is the Founder of No Limits Training, a certified nutrition coach, and a dedicated father of two. He is on a mission to help women transform from surviving to thriving, empowering them to become limitless.

Raised in poverty by a single mother of seven, O’Neil experienced the harsh realities of life early on. His father was deported when he was just two, and by ten, his family had moved eight times while in and out of women’s domestic abuse shelters.

Struggling with grand mal seizures and later battling substance abuse, O’Neil faced numerous adversities.

A near-fatal motorcycle accident in 2016 left him paralyzed for a year, $50k in debt, and forced to sell his thriving clothing business. However, this challenging period became a turning point. O’Neil rehabilitated himself and channeled his passion for overcoming limitations into helping busy, career-driven women reclaim their health and identity.

Over the past five years, No Limits Training has helped thousands of women reset their metabolic rates and eliminate stubborn belly fat without restrictive dieting or lengthy workouts. Understanding his limitations as a man, O’Neil assembled a team of expert female coaches to lead the program, ensuring clients receive empathetic and effective support.

O’Neil’s journey from hardship to empowerment fuels his dedication to his clients, proving that with the right mindset and support, anyone can become limitless.

Visit his Website and connect with him Instagram.

TALK TO A THERAPIST

If you’re feeling stuck and ready to explore these challenges more deeply, consider reaching out for professional help. Here at Outside the Norm Counseling, we’re here to support you on your journey to self-discovery and confidence. For more information, go to Outside the Norm Counselingor call us at 951-395-3288.

Thank you for joining me today. Remember, you are beautiful, you are worthy and empowered. Until next time, stay unapologetically you. Bye for now.

Useful links:

• Join our FaceBook Page – Empowered and Unapologetic
• Take the Marriage Predictor quiz!
• Follow me on Instagram
• Check out the new website! https://veronicacisneros.org/
• Outside The Norm Counseling – 951 395 3288 call to schedule an appointment today!
• 5 Things that are Killing your Marriage Free Guide available at www.veronicacisneros.org

Meet Veronica Cisneros

As a leading authority in women’s empowerment and a fierce advocate for building strong networks, Veronica is your go-to guru for turning fears into victories, struggles into strengths, and doubts into boundless opportunities.
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist for 10 plus years; empowering high-achieving women in business to conquer both professional heights and personal fulfillment. She doesn’t do bandaids!
Veronica has a unique approach to overcoming obstacles and smashing through the glass ceilings that loom over ambitious women. With her arsenal of practical tools, actionable strategies, and unwavering support, Veronica doesn’t just help women succeed in their careers – she helps them thrive in every facet of their lives.

But Veronica’s expertise isn’t just theoretical – it’s personal. With over 24 years of marriage, three daughters, and a soaring career, Veronica embodies the resilience and determination needed to navigate life’s challenges. As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Group Private Practice Owner, of Outside The Norm Counseling, Marriage Coach, and the voice behind the Empowered and Unapologetic podcast, Veronica effortlessly guides women to challenge themselves beyond their comfort zones.

Veronica is more than an expert – she’s a partner in transformation, turning mundane relationships into true connections. With her relatable charm and infectious humor, Veronica illuminates the path for women who refuse to settle for anything less than success in both business and relationships. Through practical tips, heartfelt anecdotes, and her trademark wit, Veronica empowers every woman to cultivate unbreakable bonds without sacrificing their ambitions.

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Thanks for listening!

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