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If you have ever found yourself drafting a closing argument in your head during a fight about who forgot the lunchbox, you are in good company. On the podcast, I sat with Eunice Atuejide, a solicitor qualified in both England and Nigeria who has advised on everything from corporate disputes to billion-dollar infrastructure deals. She is also a mother of five, a grandmother, and a fierce teacher of peace through perspective. Translation: she has seen conflict from the boardroom to the kitchen, and she knows what actually calms the room.

“You never, ever need to be right.”
—Eunice Atuejide

Wait, what? For high-achieving women who run households, careers, and group texts with military precision, “being right” can feel like safety. But Eunice argues that the safety we are chasing is connection, not correctness. When we choose curiosity over control, our nervous system softens, our tone lowers, and the people we love stop bracing for impact.

The Perspective Flip

Eunice uses the most unglamorous object to make a brilliant point: a sponge. From one angle you see the rough side. From another you see smooth. Same sponge. In relationships, each person speaks from a lifetime of angles: culture, upbringing, stress, old wounds. When we forget that, we turn small disagreements into character trials. When we remember it, we turn arguments into information.

“Nobody’s ever wrong. Nobody.”
—Eunice Atuejide

“Not wrong” does not mean “everything goes.” It means trade the verdict for the vantage point. Ask what story the other person is living that makes their view make sense. You do not have to agree to acknowledge logic from their side of the sponge.

How to Pause When Ego is Yelling

Eunice’s first move is not a script. It is a breath.

“Breathe. Take a moment and breathe.”
—Eunice Atuejide

Three slow inhales buy you three critical shifts:

1. From proving to perceiving. What am I missing?
2. From defense to data. What is their body language telling me? Are they shutting down, avoiding, rushing out the door?
3. From control to clarity. What do I actually want here: a win or a bond?

Talk Like You Want to Stay

Here is the part many of us skip. Communicate your need like a partner, not a project manager. If you are tired of carrying the entire family calendar, say so with tenderness and specifics: “Can you own mornings? Please set your own reminders so I am not the alarm clock.” Men who love you will be relieved to know the assignment. Your job is to ask. Their job is to step up.

Let Go to Move Forward

The common thread Eunice sees in every conflict, from divorcing couples to stalled partnerships, is the iron grip on a position. Letting go feels risky. So is living in permanent combat. Try a micro-release. Let go one inch. If the sky does not fall, let go another.

A Daily Practice for Peace

Gratitude. Simple and unoriginal because it works. Name one thing you appreciate about the person you are fighting with. It melts armor. It also reminds you why this relationship matters more than this round.

Try this today: In your next tense moment, breathe, name one thing you value about the other person, then ask one curious question. No cross-examination. Just curiosity.

If this episode hit home, DM me on Instagram @HeyVeronicaCisneros with the moment that made you pause. To learn more about Eunice’s work, find her at vipunice.com or search Eunice Atuejide on your favorite platforms. Peace is not found in the last word. It is found in the next breath.

Click here to talk to a therapist. Click here to take my on-demand 4-week course to reignite your marriage and reclaim your identity. Or, click here to explore my on-demand 2-hour workshop to reconnect with your partner.

Useful links:

• Join our FaceBook Page – Empowered and Unapologetic
• Follow me on Instagram
• Check out the new website! https://veronicacisneros.org/
• Outside The Norm Counseling – 951 395 3288 call to schedule an appointment today!
• 5 Things that are Killing your Marriage Free Guide available at www.veronicacisneros.org

Meet Chuck Barnard

Born and raised in a chaotic neighbourhood in Nigeria, Eunice learned to find joy where others saw only struggle. She went on to study law in both Germany and the UK, build a career in cross-border business and corporate law, and advise clients on everything from financial crime prevention to infrastructure development. She’s a qualified solicitor in England and Nigeria, speaks six languages, and once stood as a presidential candidate in Nigeria. She’s also a mother of five, and a grandmother.

LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/euniceatuejide/

Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/euniceatuejide/

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/eunice.atuejide/

Meet Veronica Cisneros

Veronica Cisneros, LMFT, helps women stop fighting the same fight on repeat and start truly connecting in their relationships.

A Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over 12 years of experience, Veronica specializes in helping high-achieving women break out of destructive conflict cycles and build healthier, more connected relationships—without losing themselves in the process.

As the founder of Outside the Norm Counseling, marriage coach, and host of the Empowered and Unapologetic podcast, Veronica brings a no-nonsense approach to relationship healing. Her clients know—she doesn’t do bandaids. She gets to the root.

Veronica’s guidance blends practical communication tools with deep emotional insight, empowering women to challenge old patterns, repair emotional wounds, and foster real, lasting change in their marriages and families. She’s walked the walk too—with over 25 years of marriage, three daughters, and a thriving career, she knows what it takes to navigate the messiness of love, parenting, and personal growth.

Whether she’s working with couples in her practice or coaching women through relationship burnout, Veronica helps people shift from blame and burnout to clarity, compassion, and collaboration. Her honest, relatable style—and that sharp wit—make her a trusted voice for women ready to stop surviving their relationships and start thriving in them.

Whether you listen to the podcast, join the free Facebook community, or do the Workshop,  you’re in the right place. Let’s do this together!

Thanks for listening!

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